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Winterstarre – ryuus Hort

Winterstarre

Mich hat’s umgehauen. Erkältung. Das Wochenende über war ich zu kaum was zu gebrauchen, den Samstag habe ich fast komplett im Bett verbracht, gestern war ich dann mal kurz spazieren…

park

und heute nachmittag sah’s draußen so aus:

schneetreiben

Ich fühle mich entsetzlich unmotiviert, gerade weil so viel zu tun wäre. Muß erstmal eigene Strukturen neu finden, nachdem die äußeren Knall auf Fall weggefallen sind. Tausend Fragezeichen, wie’s denn jetzt geldtechnisch weitergehen soll, Behörden-Bla, die Unsicherheit, was denn nun beruflich werden soll, das schlechte Gewissen, daß ich gerade in den Tag hinein lebe… und dann auch wieder Planungen für Reisen, Zeit, die ich mit meiner Familie verbringen will, Jul mit engen Freunden… die Zeit rauscht an mir vorbei. Wenigstens kann ich wieder klarer denken und habe das Gefühl, wieder mehr ich selbst zu sein.